Focus on the intimacy in your relationship. Reassure your loved on that your relationship can withstand conflict. Make eye contact. Calmly discuss the situation. When describing your conflict, try to think about the causes and connections between events. Establish a common framework within which to address the conflict. Pay attention to your loved one’s posture. Try to reciprocate your loved one’s positive gestures. Listen to your loved one’s point of view. Speak when it’s your turn. Find out what your loved one is feeling. Speak for about the same amount of time as your loved one. Think of your shared identity. Try to compromise. Use concrete thinking. Suggest new ways of looking at the situation. Focus on the present rather than the past.

“Love is union under the condition of preserving one’s integrity.”

— Erich Fromm